Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Running Outside VS. Inside

For those who have never experienced a Rexburg winter, let me introduce you.

And there's another 2 feet on the ground in addition to this.
Here is Jaren clearing some of it last Saturday with his giant snowblower

But on the bright side - look at it in June!

I have played sports just about my whole life.  Softball and Soccer being outside sports and Basketball and dancing being an indoor one.  Soccer is how I learned to love to run and get in shape.  While living in Washington (where I grew up) I had a few routes I used to run.  A 1, 2, 3, and 4 mile.  There is snow on the ground during the winter, but not all winter and usually it's warm enough (30, 32 degrees) that you can run outside.  So I never ran on a treadmill until I went to college.

Right away I didn't like it.  You can't run at your own pace - you have to pick one and keep at it.  It's boring because there isn't much to look at.  Thank heavens for CD players - do you remember when you had to just carry your walkman to run?, which is what I used until I got an iPod.  I was late on that bandwagon; I didn't get one until the fall of 2006.  I use the same one.  I'm hoping to upgrade to a 16 gig nano someday.  But there are other things on my list that come before that one.

Music was the only way I could run on a treadmill without going nuts.  Guess I'm a little ADD.  I've had to learn how to run on one effectively and how to put up with it. 

When I first got married I informed my new husband that unless he wanted a fat wife we needed to invest in a treadmill before I graduated from College (since I wouldn't be able to use the gym anymore).  Yes, there are a few (2 that I can think of) gyms in Rexburg, but since I live 15 minutes out of town I didn't want to drive into town and then back when I could just change, go downstairs and then come back up when I was done.

Last winter we did a bunch of research and finally bought one.  What is nice is that I have a TV in the room so I can watch and walk/run.  That helps with the being cooped up inside.

As for running outside - you can guess that I LOVE IT.  I love the sun, the warmth, the freedom to control your speed.  The views.  I especially love running in the country (good thing since that's where I live) because I think farmland is beautiful.  I love starting in April when the fields are just being worked and planted and then coming out each day through the growing season and watching the plants grow.

I'm already going nuts with my treadmill even though I've only been training for 4 weeks.  Because I knew I would be running outside a lot I did lots of research and bought a nice jogging stroller.  I've used it a few times around the mall or other places, but not to run with (as there is lots of snow covering the road).  I can't wait to run with it!  It's so smooth and light and amazing.  And Naomi will love being able to look around the outside since she's not seen much of it yet.

So, the good outdoors wins it for me.

I am so excited for March!

What do you prefer?

Friday, January 22, 2010

Mommy. Help!

It's very important to me that my baby sleeps well.  And that she learns to fall asleep by herself because I can't be there all the time.  And that she falls asleep in her own bed. 

I've been working on this since she was days old.  I had it down, too.  Until she got sick at 2 months and had a hard time sleeping and didn't feel well so she wanted to be held.  For a month.  She had a cold then an ear infection and then shots and all that added up to over a month.  She is finally all better and has been sleeping so well for the last week.

This is her schedule.  Wake up around 8:30 eats and is awake till around 10 and then goes down for her first nap.  That nap is anywhere from 2 to 2 1/2 hours.  She wakes up, eats and is up for another hour and a half and then goes down again for 2 hours.  Wakes up, eats and is up for an hour and a half to two hours and then goes down.  This third nap is 30 minutes or an hour and sometimes an hour and a half.  Then she wakes up, eats and is up until around 8 and then goes down.  She wakes up once during the night about 8 hours into her 12 hours and eats then goes right back down.

She does so well with this.  She is so happy when she is awake and doesn't give me much of a problem when I put her down.  She fusses a little bit but I just calm her down to where she's done fussing and then I leave and she falls asleep on her own.  It's been wonderful!

Then today happened.  She napped for 2 1/2 hours for her first nap.  Then her second went down like normal until she hit 30 minutes.  She woke up talking and cooing and smiling and laughing at her mobile.  Then started to fuss, I went in and gave her her pacifier which normally calms her down and she falls right back to sleep.  For about 10 minutes she fussed a little.  Then she started to cry.  I came in and tried to calm her down.  Now, when I calm her down it works and she falls back to sleep.  But not today.  She screamed and screamed and screamed.  I refused to pick her up as I didn't want to teach her that she cries and she get's picked up.  But after about 40 minutes I couldn't take anymore.  I couldn't leave her because I don't think I'm emotionally able to let her "cry it out".  So I picked her up and she stayed up and was fine for 2 hours.  She went down for her third nap and only slept 30 minutes and woke up and did the same thing but not nearly as bad for her dad.  Mostly just complaining through her paci. 

After 30 minutes we decided to just pick her up and let her be awake.  We laid her down at 8:00 and she fell RIGHT to sleep.  She was SO TIRED.  Her eyes have been red since her second nap fiasco and she's exhausted.  I felt so bad! 

She is so used to sleeping on her own that she doesn't necessarily like sleeping on someone and if she does she doesn't sleep well.  Right now I'm watching her sleeping on her monitor.  She is crying and crying in her sleep!  She's not sleeping well.  I only hope she sleeps for 12 hours like normal so tomorrow will hopefully go like it's supposed to. 

The girl needs her sleep.  I need her naps.  I get so much done! 

So my question is.... do I not even go in when she wakes after the 30 minutes.  I don't ever let her see me when I do this.  Do I just let her fuss and cry herself back to sleep?  Should I let her cry it out?  (I'm so afraid of doing this, by the way)  Do I go in and sooth her back to sleep?  I wont pick her up, though. 

I need my happy baby.  It's so incredibly sad to see her crying in her sleep right now.  She's not sleeping well. 

What did you do?  What worked for you?  I don't think I'm expecting too much out of my 3 1/2 month old since she has been doing this so well even when she was only a few weeks old. 

Help!  I can't have a repeat of today. 

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

You've Got Questions. I've Got Answers.

One of my friends posted about this site called formspring.me where you can create a profile and people can ask you questions and you choose which ones you answer.

Reading through her questions and answers I decided I wanted to do it, too.  I wanted to give anyone a chance to ask me things they would like to know anonymously or not and I would answer.  If the question is appropriate. I'll decide what is and what isn't.

Not to mention that I have always been big on journaling and this is another form. 

So, if you have a question there is a little box on my sidebar that you can ask your question and as soon as I get on I will answer it.  And if you decide to do it too, let me know so I can follow you and find out more about you :)

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Training For A Half Marathon

One of my new years resolutions is to run a half marathon.  I'm on track to run one at the end of June and possibly one at the beginning of June.

I ran through my pregnancy until the pain caused me to only walk and then to stop all together.  It felt really good to be 6 months pregnant and running 3-4 miles a day.  But that was in July and I haven't ran since.  Until last week.

I can't believe how out of shape I am!  I mean...  having to be put on bed rest and then having a C-Section will put you out of commission for a while I guess...  but seriously, this is ridiculous.

This is what I'm doing for now.  I go for half an hour and try to get further each time in that amount of time.  If, for some reason I don't even get 2 miles in that amount of time (which is what happened the first two times) I will go until I get to the 2 mile mark.  I went 32 minutes and hit 2 miles.  But the last time I ran I went 2.2 miles in 30 minutes.  So it's better!  Not to mention the 10 (literally) times I ran up the stairs and into Naomi's room because she was screaming during her nap. 

I don't run the entire time (yeah right - OUT OF SHAPE, remember?).  I try to not walk below a 3.5 on the treadmill and do intervals of the walking and then running at a 5.8-6 for a few minutes.  I've gone 3 minutes at a 6 so far and each time I try to go for 30 seconds longer.

My goal is to get to 3 miles in 30 minutes by the end of February.  It's very hard to get myself back into shape.  And it's not been fun to get on the scale and see that I've only lost half a pound when before without exercising at all I was losing a pound a week.  But, knowing what I know about the body and exercise I am retaining more water.  So, that goes up on the scale.

If in 2 weeks I'm not back on track to losing a pound or more a week I'll be sad!  Especially since I finished off my chocolate and have stopped eating that.  And I'm eating better because I'm making dinner.

Another goal?  To be within 5 pounds of my pre pregnancy weight by my 3 year anniversary.  Holy cow... 3 years.  It's in less than 3 months.  Crazy.  10 pounds in 3 months is VERY do-able. 

Friday, January 15, 2010

Why I Am "Unique"

This is going to explain why a doctor walked into a room where I was receiving an ultrasound (after baby) and said, "Well, we'll call you 'Different'.  Or, more like, 'Unique'"

It's also going to explain why I had such a weird pregnancy.  Why my belly was always lopsided, why I was in so much pain so early on, why my little nugget was stuck under the right side of my rib cage, why I started cramping from day one of my pregnancy, why I got preeclampsia, why I had to have a C-Section and why I had to go in and have my baby at 37 weeks.

Today Naomi is 3 months old and I feel comfortable enough about this that I can share my story and hopefully help someone else with the same "Uniqueness".  It's a bit personal and I ask that you don't make fun because there are others out there with the same thing who have confided in me.  I believe it's a bit more common than you think.  Thank you :)

I knew my pregnancy wasn't normal from the moment I started cramping during my second trimester when I went on walks.  I had been running and walking 4 or 5 times a week up until this point, but once the cramping started I had to slow it to just a walk.  I tried to push through it but at 30 weeks it became unbearable and scared me.  I also had been experiencing PSD pain.  That is pain from the ligaments that hold your pubic bones together (pubic symphisis) stretching too much.  Some pregnant women experience this and some don't.  For me it became quite painful.  So much that I had to stop walking.  Every time I stood it hurt, I couldn't stand on one foot, I couldn't move in bed - rolling over took a good minute with a lot of painful grunting.  I felt like such a pansy because I knew there were other women experiencing this!  But at the same time I felt like it was something more.

At 32 weeks I went into the doctor to make sure everything was okay.  I was put on bed rest and then taken off around 4 days later.  I went about my business but was very careful and couldn't do much because it hurt too bad.

"The end" happened really fast.  I went in for my 36 week check up (on a Tuesday) only to find out I had Preeclampsia.  I was given a giant jug to pee in (I filled it up and had to get a second :), put on bed rest and was told that I was going to have to have a C-Section because she was breach AND I was Preeclamptic.  Because of the Preeclampsia they didn't want to try to turn her (a version) because they were worried about the stress it would put my body under.  And knowing what we know now it is a VERY good thing they didn't.

I went in for non stress tests 3 times before my C-Section.  On Saturday I found out I would be having my baby the next week, we just didn't know what day.  Monday was my last stress test and I wasn't showing any improvements.  When I went in to see my doctor he scheduled me for Wednesday afternoon.  I went home knowing what my baby's birthday was going to be.  It was a very surreal thing.  Everything was happening so fast.  It was so weird that all of these scary things were going on inside my body but I didn't really feel it.  Other than seeing stars.

It was Tuesday night that I started to have contractions.  Not regular, but very painful.

Wednesday I went in for my C-Section.  This was the conversation:

There I lie with a sheet in between me and the hole in my stomach.  Jaren to the left of me and the very very nice anesthesiologist above me with his hands on my shoulders explaining everything that was going on when I hear,
Dr. - "Woah, you only have half a uterus!"
Me - "I do?!?!" Panic went through me until I realized it's okay because I got pregnant. I was having a baby.  Even with half a uterus I worked.
Dr. - "Wait... no... here's another.  You have two uteruses."
Me - "WHAT?!" It was such a weird feeling I can't describe it.  The reality of it hadn't settled in at all.
Me - "So, could I get pregnant in both at the same time???  Would I make the news???"
Dr. - ".............. Might make the local news"

So on went a conversation between my Doctor and the nurses about my innards.  Jaren saw the whole thing.  He said that once my doctor took out the placenta my uterus shriveled up and looked like a long skinny deflated balloon.  (Nice mental image, huh).  In his words, "A long skinny thing".

So.  There it is.  I have one Uterus split in half.  Each one has one ovary and they share one cervix.  Unless I ovulate in both at the same time I can't get pregnant in both at once.  We don't know if the left one ovulates or not.  I might only be able to get pregnant in the right one.

I had a cornucopia of hormones surging through me for a few weeks after the delivery.  Once I saw Naomi and I saw the red marks on each side of her head and realized/was told they were from my ribs did I realize how scary the whole thing was.  Her head was super skinny and oblong because of being stuck between my ribs for so long (it's rounded out now).  I cried regularly because I felt horrible for what she had to have been put through.  She was breach because she had no room to flip.  She came out with one leg completely up against her body with her foot behind her head.  I have pictures to prove it.  I was told she might have Hip Displasia because of it all.  She had no room to move!  She had no room to grow.  That is also why she was so small (5 pounds 14 ounces).  She was even more scrunched than any other baby because she had half the room and I felt responsible.  I know I'm not.  I'm okay with it now.  At times I still feel sad about it.

I didn't really feel too different or like a weirdo until the night nurse came in and saw that I had a C-Section and asked why.  I told her that I had a breach baby and preeclamsia and she said, "Oh!  Your the one with two uteruses!"  Ok... so I'm being talked about.  Guess it is something different that doesn't come around every day (or ever in this hospital).  When the same thing happened with every nurse I had I knew I was quite the story being told.  That's when I felt like a weirdie.  I should have joined the Circus.  I can see it now, "Girl with 2 uteruses"

Apparently it's much more common than I realized.  Seemed like a lot of my family looked it up or talked to people who had heard of someone who had it.  I was the first case my Doctor had personally seen.  He was VERY excited about this.  He had me do an ultrasound at 6 weeks post partum to see if they could find if they were connected (they are connected very low) or if there was any blood flow to the other one (there is so I wont be having it removed) and if I had my right kidney.  THAT was something that bothered Jaren.  No, not the weirdie half uterus that grew his baby; it was that I might only have one kidney.  Turns out I have both.

It was during this ultrasound that a doctor from the hospital came in and called me "Unique/Different".  He also told me I was very lucky to have gotten pregnant.  Especially on our second try.

Knowing what I know now:

Everything makes so much sense.  All of my weirdie complications happened because I have a weirdie uterus.  I plan on having more children.  I used to want 5-6 and now I'm hoping I can have 4.  I'm hoping my uterus can carry that many children and I'm hoping my body can handle carrying that many children (not all at the same time, mind you).  I used to want twins, but now the risk of uterine rupture would be pretty great.  It already is a bit of a risk since I've had a C-Section and I only have half a uterus to grow a full baby in.  I will always have to have a C-Section and always deliver early.  The goal will be to get me to 37 weeks.  My doctor said that I'm not considered high risk and I'm grateful for that.  The Preeclampsia probably happened because my body was under so much stress with my uter (that's really what they are called.... weird, huh) being super stretched.  That's probably why I retained so much water (and why I looked like a blown up whale).

The other thing.... and I'm going to get a bit emotional and spiritual here; is how I see Heavenly Father's hand in all of it.  I always felt like things were a little different and that I wouldn't carry full term.  I didn't know why.  Every night when I knelt to pray I had a very strong impression to ask that my little girl be fully developed when it came time for her to come and that she would stay in until she was fully developed.  If they had tried to do a Version there could have been some serious and severe consequences to both Naomi and I.  Because I had preeclampsia they didn't do that and they decided to take me early.  Had they not taken me early there could have been uterine rupture or I could have gone into labor which would have been bad since she was breach and my body would have been under more stress than normal.  And if they hadn't done a C-Section we never would have known about this.  The kicker?  That Naomi was born 3 weeks early and didn't need one aid.  Not one.  No oxygen, her blood sugar was always fine.  She latched and ate so well that we didn't need any help there.  She was perfect.  Her hips have managed to work themselves out and the orthopedist says she has perfect beautiful symmetry.  There are no permanent side effects of her restricted growing space and abrupt stop to it.  She is perfect and I am eternally grateful for a Heavenly Father who knows me so well and takes care of us.

I only hope I don't have problems getting pregnant when I want to again.

Here are some pictures:
At 14 weeks - looks normal

 17 weeks - the first time I saw the lump on my right side
25 weeks - normal while standing
35 weeks - had to capture the right sided bump
The morning of October 14th, 2009
I was very very uncomfortable and very swollen
After 2 bags of fluid pumped into me by the IV (which hurt very badly (worse than the spinal), by the way).
Even more swollen (and yes, that is my giant belly you can see)
My beautiful miracle

She is so sweet.

And might I just mention that my little 3 month old nugget is 10 pounds 3 ounces!  Very excited about that.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Project 365

Maybe you have noticed the button on the top of my side bar.  The sparkly black letters. 

It's a new blog I started (I know I'm trying to keep up with three now).  This one is different in that it will only be of pictures and very few words.  Unless I'm telling a story on the picture as one of them shows.

My goal is to take a picture every day and post it so that at the end of the year I'll have a year full of pictures that tell a story of that day.  Or maybe it doesn't.  Maybe it's just something I saw and wanted to post.

I plan on using nap time and evening time to keep up with my blogging.  Also in a day I need to exercise, clean and cook.

I on my way to becoming super mommy/wife!  It's a long road I'm starting to pave.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

12 Weeks Post Partum

Today my little girl is 12 weeks old.  I feel like time has passed me by so quickly. 

The first month was all one big day.  Feeding every 3 hours and healing from my C-Section.  Trying to sleep and having both my mom and my mother in law watching Naomi so I could get 4-5 hour naps during the day.  I will always be grateful for that.  Pretty sure that's how I kept my sanity.

The second month was much better.  We had a predictable eating/wake/sleep schedule and it was at 6 weeks that she started to sleep for 6 hour stretches.  Then at 7 weeks it turned into 6-8 and has since stayed.  It was when she was in her 8th week she got sick (and is just barely about over it.  Two more days of antibiotics) and it has put us in a bit of a stand still on progress. 

Not just her progress, but mine too.  She was very needy and finding time to exercise was pretty much non existent.  And I've felt 100% fine to exercise since 5 weeks post partum. 

I'm much more motivated now to exercise and finish loosing the weight than I was 2 weeks ago.  Maybe it's the new year.  Maybe it's because there is only 6 months to the half marathon I'm really hoping to run and it's been just over 4 months since I've exercised.  Which means I'm super super out of shape.  And running today proved that.

I lost another pound so I'm at 115 (remember - fake numbers).  15 pounds to lose till I'm at my pre pregnancy weight (and wearing my skinny clothes again).

Here are some visuals.

This first one was taken just 4 days after I found out I was pregnant.  I was 5 weeks and weighed 100 lbs (I wish).

Annnd today.  At 115.  It tried to wear the same clothes.  I am wearing the same pants and the same shirt except it has three quarter length sleeves and is green.  But the size and brand/style is the same.

I'll probably post other pre pregnancy pictures.  They are highly motivating.  And it's so funny how I used to wish I was smaller and now I am trying so very hard to get back to that point. 

p.s. I totally think I look 15 weeks pregnant in these pictures.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Resolutions: 2010

I went back and read my 2009 resolutions and realized I only kept 2 of the 5 (having a baby and ironging Jaren's shirts).  The exercise one was easy to keep until I hit my third trimester during pregnancy and had complications.  I read my scriptures very often, but not daily.  And cleaning the bathrooms once a week?  Oh man... I wont even go there.   

1.  Get back to my pre pregnancy weight
2teach Naomi how to dance
3Run a half marathon
4effectively juggle housework, cooking, wife-ing and mommy-ing
5Sell stuff on Etsy to make money for house decorations and clothes - for both baby and I.

6Unless I'm sick or immobile: do push ups and sit ups daily
7.  Become fluent in DSLR camera
8.  Learn how to edit pictures

8!  It might be too many.....