21 Weeks

First - thank you everyone for giving me your email so I can add you to the private blog we will start once the kid is born. Again, I'm keeping this one up and running - it will just have less of her. I know some of you were reading and are a bit shy to let us know - thank you for sending your email, I would love for you to keep reading and you will be added! If you have no idea what I'm talking about - refer to this post.

This week has been interesting. It had been a few weeks since I had exercised daily and I think it was taking a negative toll on my body. My back hurt worse and I was very VERY tired. So I went 4 days in a row and even after the first day I started to feel better. I've noticed that there are some days I don't even need a nap. It's nice! I get a bit more done because I have a bit of energy and I can't stand sitting on the couch ALL day - so I get off it. On days I get a nap I usually sleep for 1 1/2 - 2 hours so it takes up a big chunk of the day and I don't get as much done. My back doesn't hurt all day - just seems to at night. And it's mostly the right side deep under my pelvis.

My wedding ring - this I cannot wear while I sleep, shower, or exercise because my fingers swell. Well, they don't swell in the shower - I just prefer it off. So, I knew that my fingers would probably get fat and I wouldn't be able to wear it. I just figured it would happen near the END of my pregnancy (why do all these things that I thought happened at 7 months seem to be happening at 5?!). I can still wear it - it just get's a bit snug when I'm hot, which unfortunately has been happening quite a bit lately. It's not a big deal to not wear the ring - especially here. In Rexburg - if your a pregnant woman and you don't look 16 and you don't have a wedding ring - everyone still knows your married and your fingers are just too fat. But elsewhere - not so much. And I like being married! Jaren thinks it's funny I feel this way. He says, "You know your married - isn't that good enough?" No!! I don't want to look like an unwed teenager that got knocked up! Because, I really do still get mistaken for 17 (and I'm 23 next month). It just needs to be able to squeeze on til mid August. That's my last trip away from home where I feel the need to look married. I know it's silly - but I really really really really like my wedding ring. Jaren says he'll get it sized bigger for me. But then we'd have to fix it again in a few months after I have her and the sausages that are my fingers un-swell themselves. Which isn't something I want to do. I'm thinking of going to J.C. Penny where they have those $25 dollar abnormally huge fake rock rings. I'll get one and it will make me feel better. :) I'll post a picture of my alternate when I get one.

My appetite has come back! I say that with both excitement and dread. Excitement because things are finally tasting good again and dread because now I want to eat - EVERYTHING - all the time. It's not constant, but one night it was horrible. I wanted chicken nuggets - so I had a 10 peice and some fries (Wendy's fries are the best tasting things, let me tell you). Not even 15 mintues went by when I decided I wanted hot cheetos. Jaren talked me out of it for another 15 - but oh how I WANTED them!! It's not like those cravings you get when you think - Mmm, I need chocolate - or ice cream or pizza. No, this is like it's all I can think about, I can't sit still I neeeeeeed it! So, he let me grab a handful. And that's all I needed! But then, an hour later - I wanted brownie batter. I don't know if anyone remembers this post - but if you do, you will know this is something I do a few times a year. I tried when I was in my first trimester and it didn't taste right! It was so sad - I was really, really sad. But here I was wanting it again! So, again, Jaren tried to talk me out of it - since it was 9:30, but after seeing me writhe in agony for 10 minutes on the couch and floor he said - OKAY, go make yourself some brownie batter. So I did - and it was glorious!! So tastey and then I made the rest and Jaren ate 90% of those over the next few days :) After I ate it - I felt completely satisfied. I felt guilty about the calorie content of everything I ate, but I had no more cravings. And I haven't had any that strong since. Which I am grateful, because I don't think I can handle another night like that more than once every other week or so. Because even though I was enjoying it - I knew it was not the most nutritous and it would help add to the obsene amount of weight I feel I'm gaining. So I felt guilty.

As for the little girl who likes to roll and karate kick in my tummy - she is a happy camper, I believe. I feed her lots and I spread out so she isn't confined, because any type of bending is fast becoming quite painful. I can't even stretch while I'm laying down. You know, like when your on your side and you arch your back - nope - HURTS. Darn muscles and ligaments. She is definitly getting stronger. But every single time I feel her move or kick; I smile. Especially since I've been told that laying on your back can cut off their blood supply and kill them - SCARY. So when I wake up in the morning and she moves or head butts me I sigh, smile and say, "Oh good, I haven't killed you, your still alive." Because I used to HATE sleeping on my back. It was so uncomfortable! But now? Since I've been pregnant I wake up to find myself on my back all the time! But it feels so nice. So I don't sleep well because I'm so consious of my movements. Do you know how far along you have to be for that to happen? Uhg. I worry about so much more now.

Jaren is so funny. He thinks that if I'm cold - she is. Or if i'm hot - she is. Or if I'm hungry - she is. I try to tell him that she's got quite the kush life going on. Floating around in warm amniotic fluid, moving around all she wants, getting fed so she is never hungry, peeing whenever she wants wherever she wants. She is more protected and comfortable than I am. "You don't have to do that - your pregnant" Like it has made me handicapped. I feel useless a lot of the time. And a lot of the time - I am. I'm hoping I can get a bit more motivation and energy soon so I can get stuff done!

That's all for this week - the next 2 Tuesdays I'll be in Michigan - so hopefully I can keep up to date.

21 weeks:

2 pictures - one with hand on belly, one without.
I'm rather sunburnt, if you can tell. I've been at Green Canyon all day with my girls for girls camp and sat in a chair reading Harry Potter for a bit(cause I'm trying to get through the 6th before the movie - probably wont happen since I'm only half way through the second right now).

(I'm tired too)And this is one of my flower pots. I'm so proud. I love to just look at them. This is the third spring we have been in this house and before I was in school and didn't have time to do anything. But this summer we have a few pots with some flowers in them! The house still looks a bit sparse, but we are making progress.